Is it solitude that you seek but end up being lonely?

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Dear Daisy,

Tell me something - if there was no one in front of whom you could pretend to be happily single, will you still feel awesome, all ALONE? Okay let me elaborate. CLOSE YOUR EYES. No, no, no, wait. First let me describe the situation. Just imagine, you are on a beautiful island. There is a gorgeous house on the beach. You can see the sun rising from your bedroom window. You have all the facilities you can think of - internet, swimming pool, gym, home theatre, etc. And the most important thing (well according to me, but I'm sure most of you will agree with me here)- an unlimited access to all types of delicious, finger-licking good, food. BUT, you are alone. You can talk to anyone over the cell or chat but no personal one-on-one contact. You have your dream job but let's just say you're working remotely. Now, close your eyes and just feel the moment.

 Does this feel peaceful? Are you, right now, wishing for this?  If yes, then, for how long can you survive this?

 There are a lot of people who claim that they are happily single, that they do not need anyone else to make them happy. I agree. Happiness should come from within. You and only you are in control of your happiness. But I believe that most of these people are just trying to hide their fear of loneliness by pretending that they are independent, that the lack of responsibility and commitment is freedom, that the presence of someone else will interfere with their peace of mind. 

This kinda 'freedom' is temporary. And before we realise, loneliness will silently creep into our lives. People often confuse loneliness with solitude. Mind you, these are two very different things.

"There is a difference between loneliness and solitude, one will empty you and one will fill you. You have the power to choose."- Ava

solitude-or-loneliness
Sometimes, solitude is fine. In-fact it is a requirement.  It helps us to introspect. You get to see the bigger picture when you distance yourself from everything and everyone. And it is very important to see the bigger picture coz it solves a lot of problems. On the other hand, loneliness is a wretched feeling. It is almost equivalent to physical pain. Solitude is a choice, loneliness is not. If you want to know a detailed difference then do go through what is solitude?

Do you think your favourite movies would be so much fun without your friends or that cricket/ football match without your siblings? Doesn't the food taste better when cooked by your Mom and is savoured in the presence of your family? Won't your life be meaningless without that random hug from your sister, that valuable advice from your father or even the romantic cuddle in the middle of the night with that special someone.

You might want to run away from a bad relationship and think that you would be better off alone. But make sure you don't end up being lonely, coz it does not mean that if one person or situation turned bad, everything's going to be the same way.


Love, Ani

Comments

  1. UnknownApril 11, 2019 at 6:54 AM

    Awesome..👍🏼

    ReplyDelete
  2. Sovan SatpathyApril 11, 2019 at 8:28 AM

    Every person in your life plays a crucial role and no one person can fullfill all roles. U need to be part of all kinds of relationships and value those, enjoy those, that's when you don't feel lonely.
    I would also be inclined to say that perhaps loneliness creeps into our life because of the choices we make.

    ReplyDelete
  3. AnonymousApril 12, 2019 at 10:38 AM

    Awesome !.! Keep posting.

    ReplyDelete
  4. NiteshApril 12, 2019 at 11:28 AM

    That's true and something to follow. Kudos for examples given!

    ReplyDelete
  5. Abhipsha DasApril 14, 2019 at 9:55 AM

    Sometimes, I wonder, if it's the lack of commitment and responsibility alone, or the pessimism and nervous jitters about the ' n number of things that could go wrong', that make you want to seek solitude?

    And then again, loneliness is but a perception. You could be surrounded by a lot of people and yet feel lonely. Or you could be all alone in your room, with a hot mug of coffee, and feel perfectly at peace. Don't you think?

    ReplyDelete

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